Nigerian film Reviews

Happy new year.

It's been awhile that I wrote something on my blog because motherhood took the better part of my time but now that the children are becoming independent, I can have my life back and start doing some of the things I love.

There are so many film review blogs, and writers already, so why do I want to join the train? Well, I guess I figured, I can do something different. The honest truth is there is nothing new under the sun but we can always spot the difference.

Since my core competence is screenplay, my film review will pretty much center around the story/script. I will leave out the technical analysis to those who knows best. So my reviews will probably look more academic than entertaining. But I promise not to bore you with it.

So watch out for the next post.

Nollywood stereotype

When you hear Nollywood, what comes to mind is cheap, low quality and distasteful films but... a very Big BUT, that is just one side of the story.

There are two types of Nollywood; One Nollywood is the 'just do it' despite little fund because we are passionate about telling our own stories, another Nollywood is Ambitious. One Nollywood says give me a camera and few thousands of dollars and I will make a film, another Nollywood says give me the right budget and then I'll make the blockbustermovie. One Nollywood says give me a chance and then I'll prove myself another Nollywood says prove yourself first and then you'll get a chance.

One Nollywood lives in the optimism of our hearts, another Nollywood thrives in the mediocrity of our minds. One Nollywood wants, the other Nollywood hopes. One Nollywood leads, the other Nollywood follows. One Nollywood is satisfied with local audience, another Nollywood craves global appeal.

These conversions are on the rise, with each passing day, more and more filmmakers from the other Nollywood are coming over to the other side though quietly while the world is not looking. A pulsating dynamic new Nollywood is emerging. A Nollywood whose faith in success is far greater than its fear of failure. A Nollywood that no longer gather half baked professionals as film crew but go the extra mile to hire crews who knows their onions.

History they say is a bad motorist, it rarely ever signals its intentions that its taking a turn. This is that rarely of a moment, history is turning a page. For over three decades, Nollywood has run, stumbled, rolled over, got up and dusted herself and continued but now in the wake of our fame as the 2nd largest movie producing country in the world, critics and observers see Nollywood as one thing and one thing only. And one Nollywood, a tiny little voice in back of the head, is looking  at the structures in place and wants to resume business as usual but the other Nollywood is looking up at the sky and saying, it is time to fly.

Felled by a Police

Born to a modest family, Fred, 24years old university graduate has always nursed the ambition of becoming a pilot but like some dreams; lack of money often truncate them. Fred was however tenacious, temping, saving money for over 6 years, until he got a terrestrial angel who added to his saved pilot school tuition fee. In a week, Fred will be flying out of the country to resume school, living his dream and there is no way to measure whose joy was greater between his or his mother. His siblings were all happy for him.

In the early hours of an Environmental Sanitation Saturday, Fred and his friends choose to play football on the deserted street after doing a little cleaning. Not long afterwards, a police van pulls to a stop, three police officers jumped out, backing at the boys; ‘why did you block the road? The boys stop playing, each trying to pick up the stones serving as goal post on the ground. Fred was closest to them and one police officer grabs him as he bends over to pick up the stones, barking out the same question.

Before Fred could respond, he has been kicked and pushed to the ground by another police officer. Fred’s friends watch from a safe distance as Fred protests on ground, wondering what his offence was. Fred’s outburst further infuriated the police officers, kicking and stripping him naked. Fred is now screaming, all bruises and blood. On a final note, one police officer, pulled the trigger, shot Fred dead, they all entered the van and zoom off.

The mother wailed, the family mourned, friends tweet, media flashed the news mildly, IG of Police claimed, Fred assaulted his men and the suspected police officer claimed it was a stray bullet in court. The killer police was later discharged and acquitted for lack of inadequate evidence.

There are so many Freds whose life has been cut short and their killers are walking free. To stop this menace, share your story and send pictures of the deceased to info@stellarmoviesng.org or upload photos and share a Fred’s story here.

You can never be that

Too often great people have been told by someone, a class teacher, a friend, a parent or a neighbor that 'you can never be this or that'. Check it, almost all great people have had that vote of doubt cast over their life.

I've had my share. It was the winter of 2005, in the outskirt of Lagos, somewhere in a secluded guest house, close to the beach. It was a gathering of screenwriters and directors; it was a script conference of international magnitude. I was green and optimistic about the vast opportunities this will portend for me.

How wrong could I be, after the head writer went through my first draft, after breakfast with every writer present and seated, he took time to comment on everyone's screenplay. When it got to my turn, he bluntly said I just didn't get it at all. I took it in well though feeling quite embarrassed in front of other writers; I sunk deeper into my seat with an air of injured dignity.

I cried a lot beside the beach that night and was unable to do a rewrite because I didn't even know where to start. In screenwriting parlance, a head writer could find fault with either your dialogue, or structure, or plot, or character authenticity, redundant scenes or combination of two or three that could be fixed but to be told that your full screenplay sucks is disheartening. So after drying my tears the next day, and having been evicted anyway, I summoned courage to ask the almighty Head writer what aspect of my screenplay sucks. And his response dazed me, he said, 'your dialogues were on the nose'!

I made a silent scream and protested, 'just that, of course it can be fixed, why didn't you just say the problem was with the dialogue? And then he launched into a depressing speech to tell me 'how I could never make it as a screenwriter; the best that could happen to me was to be a Government propaganda writer'. I swallowed hard, silently entered the bus that was waiting to convey me back to town.

It's 7years since that incidence and I have done well for myself as a screenwriter, teaching and writing screenplays within and outside the country. I'm yet to do anything propaganda in nature for the Government and I don't see that happening any time soon. I'm no huge fan of Government.

To everyone out  there who have been told you can't and you did, please share your story.

Money-Matters

I couldn't help thinking all day the previous day about perspectives, the word, paradigm shift, world view and POV. I figure it could be interesting how one thing could mean different things to two people. I love movies/films. I love writing it initially and I was satisfied with just writing it but my longing to produce one of my own now is intense. And someday...not too far from today it will happen but before it does happen, I have deep appreciation for film makers anywhere in the world. Some are in it just for the money, some in it for the love of it and others are in it for both.

For that ambitious film maker who has been daydreaming of one day becoming a Steven Spielberg or a Kunle Afolayan or a Chris Roland, when he finally gets that first chance to turn that age-long script into a motion picture, it's a dream come true. He has fantasized about the posters, the box office reviews and cinema audience.

Now for someone to reduce that whole process to 'money matters' is to stifle the joy and satisfaction the act of creation brings. No sir, it is not money matters, it is one man's aspiration to make his dream come true even if his script is not so high up there but somebody loved it enough to be willing to sponsor it.

It hurts for someone to tag another man's dream as mere 'money matters', no. That is not what it is. Money may come as a result of it but for that young man; it's a dream come true. That is what it is.

Ashamed then but not anymore

In the year, 1997, my matriculation day, I was very reluctant to do a ceremonious matriculation like most students do. especially those students studying prestigious courses. I had requested that my family need not come to school to celebrate with me, afterall I was only studying biology education; a thing of shame, not worth rejoicing over. Nobody will anyway or so I thought.

I had been avoiding familiar faces, lest i will be asked what I was studying. I made effort to make myself invisible to all and couldn't wait till 200L to change my course/faculty. Just for the record, I had sneaked to the matriculation venue to take a picture with the matric gown and there I saw a guy that fascinated me.

He was jubilantly matriculating, taking pictures with friends and family. He had his shoulders high and was merry making. I stood there admiring him and thinking to myself that he must be studying Medicine or Engineering and I wished I could be as happy as he was or at least be studying a much better course.

I spent the night wishing I was that happy and contented guy and dragged myself to class the next morning to receive an education course. And what did I see, sitting not too far from me was the guy I had admired so much. He wasn't studying engineering or medicine, he was studying maths education.

The shock stayed with me for a long time. I had never imagined anyone could be so happy studying education but I also realized how ungrateful I was. That guy was grateful for the same thing I was mournful about and for the 4year duration, the guy rocked our faculty and I sulked.

Oh Lord, may I always be grateful for even what I don't like. 13years later, I write and I teach screenwriting for a living and I am not ashamed of it. In fact, I wouldn't have it any other way. Thank God for everything, it's only with hindsight that I can connect the dots.

And the winner is....

That phrase is an all too familiar one when the winner is about to be named amongst  other contestants. We've seen it several times on TV but it is a different thing to experience it. And so it was my turn to experience it this year at the first Africa International film festival in Portharcourt.


In my case, it was a screenwriting competition, and there were twelve contestants and only three winners must emerge. The first winner was called and I nodded, cos I knew he deserved it, no panic. When the second winner was called, I said yes he deserved to win too cos I loved his screenplay but I also felt, 'is this guy not going to call my name?


Lastly my name was called, and I also said 'yeah, I deserved it too' in my heart. No drama, no, it was devoid of the tension we used to see in reality TV shows but nonetheless thrilling to be a winner.


So I won the monetary sum to produce my short that will be screened at the 2011 AFRIFF. That's one feather to my hat and my naughty friend has asked me to blow my trumpet. I just did.

What every film maker needs

A script doctor is indispensable for every film maker. Especially here in Nigeria that a film maker wears different hats, including the screenwriter’s hat. The original screenplay can be yours but you need the owl-like eye of a script doctor to chisel the screenplay into shape.

A Script Doctor always know for sure what is wrong with a screenplay and exactly how to fix it.

This skill comes with years of practice, experience and one other thing that is innate and special. It is a can-fix attitude. It is a leadership skill, a problem-solving skill, one that believes it can save the world if necessary.

Long years of writing screenplay is inadequate is to become a script doctor really. Because once a writer is judgmental and sentimental by nature it could get in the way of treating diseased screenplays even if the writer has been writing for years on end.

That said, then how do you find a good script doctor?

Two ways to go about it are; one, employ a recommended one. Two, test or interview the writer; the same way Donald Trump will do before hiring an apprentice.

As a film maker, wear all the hats you need to if necessary but get a script Doctor to give your screenplay the humph it deserves.

What is writing screenplay like?

The process is like a woman in different stages of child labor; with occasional sharp pains but in the brain this time. It is hard, painstaking, solitary and time-consuming. Sometimes you laugh, while at it. Sometimes you cry, sometimes you shout and sometimes you talk to someone. But once you PUSH out the last bit of the idea, and the BABY is born, you heave a sigh of relief and can’t wait to start the process all over again with another idea.

The joy is incomplete until you hear people’s comment about your life’s work, your screenplay, your film… your BABY. Sometimes it is good, sometimes it is bad, people will give it different interpretation but at the end of the day, if your screenplay achieves what you set out to achieve, then your job is done. Your BABY turned out well.

The indispensable Script Doctor

A Script doctor is very similar to a medical doctor in many ways; their major difference is their patient. A script doctor can diagnose accurately the diseased areas in a screenplay just by reading through and that’s not all; she always has a cure.

All she does is look out for symptoms or weakness of the screenplay which could fall in any of the category below.

The symptoms are:

1.       Original idea and audience appeal.

2.       Character and character development

3.       Story structure and forward movement

4.       Plotting and change points

5.       Suspense and surprise

6.       Visual storytelling

7.       Dialogue (Is it too much?  Too little? On the nose? or Just right?)

8.       Scenes and style.

9.       Layout

Once that is done, she applies just the right treatment to correct the weaknesses and there before your eyes is a film to remember.

Professional Ethics

Most times after watching a very terrible movie, the natural instinct when asked by someone who hasn’t seen it is to blatantly admit it is a total wash out. Words of condemnation can stream out of your mouth unconsciously to express your disappointment and it is okay. 

But it ceases to be okay once you decide to take up the screenwriting profession.

The reason is very simple, very soon your work will come under the searchlight as well and you will come to understand how hard it is to write a blockbuster movie. So in screenwriter parlance, you are permitted to say the movie works for me… if you love it. Or it doesn’t work for me… if you dislike it.

The reason we play on words in critiquing other people’s works is this.

1.      Screenwriting takes a lot of effort to put together and it will be very demoralizing to outrightly pass a vote of no-confidence on another person’s work.

2.       Because it is a creative piece, it is very subjective. What doesn’t appeal to one may appeal to another.

3.       Experienced screenwriters always know that every bad screenplay can be fixed, so it isn’t out right rubbish.

So as a screenwriter, the next time you watch a movie that doesn’t work for you…think of possible ways the writer could have handle it better.